Tough love

I was a tomboy - would you believe it? All other children my age were boys. I hated getting my hair done, wearing dresses, keeping clean... of course, my mom always made certain I left the house wearing a pretty dress, my hair in bright colored bows, and her little girl, as clean as a little sugar-puddin' doll-face could ever be.

But I played like a boy, and boy, I played rough. I climbed trees, poles, monkey bars, jungle gyms, cabinets, and anything else that was "climbable". I've fallen into mud puddles, crayfish infested ponds, and even a pool of sewage. I sped around the neighborhood in my bicycle pretending to be the "Masked Rider"... jumped from one dirt hill to another imagining I'm on board the great "Star Blazer", and fighting vicious monsters because I was "Ultra Man"!! (FYI: This was in the 70's in Japan.)

My parents have been called in to meet with my (preschool/kindergarten/1st grade) teachers on more than one occasion to talk about my aggressive behavior... "Every time I turn to look at her, she's hanging from a tree or trying to climb the shelves", "she's making the other children cry", "the boys are afraid of her".

Teachers regularly stopped by our home to discuss my "issues" with my parents. Oh, but nothing could ever be as frightening as when my dear mother spots me walking home from a distance with my hair in a disgusting mess, my pretty girlie dress drenched in God-knows-what, and my elbows and knees scraped and bloody - yet again. I'd get my spanking, a bath in some pretty smelling bubbles, a good reprimanding, and finally sent to my room to think about all that I've done.

I had an incredible childhood!

What is the moral of this story, you ask? My parents allowed me to explore, go on adventures, discover, cry, bleed. They encouraged me to want more, reach higher, experience something new every day. They taught me to be responsible for myself... my bleeding leg, my broken bike, my torn dress. Didn't matter who pushed me down the hill or whose dog attacked me. They gave me their love, support, and compassion... then, talked with me about what I should do next time to avoid getting into trouble. I was in charge of ME.

Okay, okay... the point? Don't be afraid of getting hurt or making mistakes. If you don't go out there and just do it, nothing will ever happen. And most important of all, others can help provide you with knowledge, tools, love, and support... but, only *you* can help yourself. Don't blame anything or anyone else for anything - you are responsible for who you are and the life you live.

Still don't get it? That's okay, at least I know what I'm trying to say.